When You Wait Too Long
by blackindiaink
Summary: Series of drabbles Each chapter focusing on either Aubrey, Chloe, or Beca. Strings together a story, a triangle of sorts. Will it be Chaubrey... will it be Bechloe? Stick around and find out.
1. Aubrey

**A/N: This triangle is irresistible to me and I'm not even sure how it will end up. This is just a series of drabbles that I was compelled to write after my hiatus. **

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A sort of sad pallor overtook Chloe's features and Aubrey watched as it washed all the usual cheer from her favorite face. The rolling coldness in her stomach was the nuanced realization that she, or more precisely, her actions, had caused the change.

She couldn't help remembering the voice that spoke in the quiet part of her mind for the past three months. The one that urged her not to give in to her feelings, not to take a chance. Change was one thing that Aubrey detested.

The way it screwed with her control and made her evolve from the pattern she had created in her life. She needed her best friend and would not sacrifice that relationship for the warm storm created inside her body when they kissed. So, she backed away, faster and faster, until she could no longer discern the exact look on Chloe's face. It blurred through salt water and distance.

Turning to run, tears streaming from her eyes, she absolved herself of the guilt by thinking that this was better. It was, because there was nothing that could wreck her life like losing the person she cared about most.

Forget the night they had spent wrapped in each other, hoping that daylight would not come. Aubrey had to forget it, push back the feeling that what she was losing was the making of her.

When she reached the dorm, she rushed into her room and collected all the things she would need to stay at her father's house. It was a thirty minute trip, down a winding road, and away from all the issues that plagued her. When she got there she would have to explain, lie, but that was okay. As long as she could take comfort in her old room, breathe the fresh air, and loose herself in grooming her horse, all would be well.

Chloe would forgive her and see the wisdom in what she had done. She would move on, maybe with Beca. An invisible fist wedged into her abdomen, making the air rush out. The image of Beca kissing Chloe after Regionals appeared like a ghost.

That was something she would have to get used to again. Seeing Chloe with other people had always been hard but now she had even more reason to appear to be fine with it. She had made her choice. Throwing that night to the back of her mind like baggage she would have to carry with her, she left their shared dorm but stopped in the doorway.

On the peg by the door hung Chloe's hound's tooth coat. Impulse overtaking her, she reached out and grabbed the neck of the thick fabric and brought it to her face. It smelled of fig and lavender, Chloe's perfume.

The scent mingled with her thoughts bringing the utter fear of loss screaming into her mind. She shoved the coat away, not caring that it fell onto the floor and rushed down the hall and into the stairwell.

When she got to her car she threw the bag in the back and got behind the wheel. When she looked up at the dorm she saw the light she had left on shining in the window and the brush of the curtain as air from the vent disturbed it.

One deep breath got the perfume out of her system and she left, hoping that when she returned it would all be back to the way it was before. A few days distance would do them good. It would set their orbits to right.


	2. Chloe

There was never even a chance to say anything before Aubrey was running away. A horror movie played before Chloe, a greatest fear slapping her in the face. She sputtered out letters that didn't make words, just sounds taken away on the night breeze. Syllables that would never reach Aubrey's ears.

Breathing made her aware that she was still there, Air in… air out. The exchange felt the opposite of the inequality of their feelings. The years long journey that got them to this led to another brick wall. The abrupt rejection made her feel wasted, like an empty well.

Turning was her only option. She moved her heavy feet in a cadence of defeat, heading towards the only place she could think of to find comfort; Beca's dorm. There solace would be easily met. Since last year they had become close, so close that Aubrey had become jealous and accusatory. She refused to believe that nothing was going on between them.

Chloe looked up in time to see that her goal was approaching fast. The door to Beca's dorm was open, another student held it open for her. Last week she decided to just let Aubrey think what she wanted to because it was no use. Logic, which usually had a very snug home in Aubrey's actions, had fled and took with it the ability to see beyond her feelings.

She stopped in front of the elevators and looked over at the stairwell. Usually, this would be her route, even though Beca lived on the fourth floor but the thought of taking each step was daunting. When she stepped into the elevator her back found the wall and its support was necessary.

When she let it go and stopped denying the assumptions thrown at her Aubrey had again pronounced her guilty. How they had gotten from there to kissing was a series of disconnected events, jumbled like brush. She picked her way through it, remembering the fight. Out on the quad they had come together in confrontation. Of course, that was the only way that they could let the repressed, inside-out feelings surface.

Love, that is what she felt for Aubrey, but now it condensed on the inside of her heart and slid in tiny droplets down the sides, making her feel sick. She realized that she was knocking on Beca's door when her hand started hurting. She cleared her throat and stopped when the door flew open.

Beca was there, headphones on her neck, her irritation apparent. "What's up?"

Chloe knew that look. She had interrupted a mixing session. Pushing past Beca, she lay down on the bed face first. The familiar smell of the pillow under her head was comforting. She welcomed it and let herself feel its was attracted to Beca but she was in love with her Aubrey. If only they could switch places. Beca was much easier to figure out and less work.

A hand grazed her shoulder and she felt strands of her hair being lifted and smoothed away. "You okay?"

"No," Chloe answered into the pillow. She didn't care if the word was indecipherable. Beca would get it.

"Okay," Beca said. The soft hair fell through her hands faster and she shifted. Her headphones were set aside and she swallowed hard. Chloe was the only person that could make her feel this. It was a need to care for her. Just the simple need to make Chloe feel better because it hurt to see her like this.

Chloe flipped her head over and saw the look on Beca's face. It was strangely tender and there was something in her eyes that had never made its way to the surface. Her mouth opened but her eyes widened. She was transfixed.

Beca looked away. "What?"

Chloe stumbled over the path back to words. "Nothing." She pursed her lips. "I just had a bad night and I wanted to see you." She couldn't tell her about Aubrey yet. Hanging onto that vulnerability for a little longer and seeing if it would stay was more enticing. Feeling a connection that she had no doubts about was what she needed.

Her fingers twitched, shifting towards Beca. It was a slow trip, sliding across the sheet until her skin met Beca's. All she had to do was raise up. If she wanted to push past that boundary, this was the time because she could feel the atmosphere thicken with every thought that had ever entered her mind about this,

No, she wouldn't, couldn't… but Beca could. She waited the second it took for them to come together feeling like a statue. The second set of lips to meet hers that night were sweet and soft and she lost the feel of Aubrey. The memory of their kiss shifted so that this one could take its place. Maybe that was for the best.


	3. Beca

There was an irrefutable fact, one Beca had learned through experience; people suck. Every time she tried to believe otherwise someone proved her theory. It started with her Dad. He had always been her favorite person when she was little. She loved her Mom but there was something about her relationship with her dad that made her feel special, like they owned part of the world.

Until he cheated on her Mom and everything fell apart. He left and she shut him out, protecting herself from further emotional pain. He tried to reach her at first but she wouldn't hear him and as the years went on they grew apart completely. He remarried and she settled into a comfortable life with her mother.

High school had proved it all over again. When she let herself get close to someone it blew up in her face. The girl was an outsider, a misfit, just like Beca believed herself to be. She came to school junior year with her outlandish clothing and unique sensibilities, but by the end her trust was once again betrayed.

That was why it took her so long to give in to her feelings for Chloe. They flirted a lot, and at first she had attributed it to Chloe's nature. It couldn't be helped, but slowly she succumed to the charms. There was something about the red hair, the glowing smile, and Chloe's ability to make her feel like she was the only person in the world.

It was like a drug and it had taken her a year of staunch resistance to realize that it was impossible. She was going to have to let someone in eventually and Chloe seemed to be who her heart, or at least her hormones had chosen. So, on that night when they were alone in her room and she could tell that there was something different about Chloe, that something had happened, but she didn't stop herself.

Kissing Chloe was different. It was the willful act of jumping off a cliff. There was no net, no cord to break her fall, she was out there in the free air, falling towards earth. She felt Chloe's lips move against hers and she was buoyed against the air rushing past her. The kiss changed from a tentative caress of impulse to a long, involved exploration.

Finally, Beca was sure that this was the right choice, but Chloe pulled away. Retracting the parachute and she once again felt herself rushing towards confusion. Chloe opened her mouth and then closed it, walking away. Her back was turned and her body was tense.

"I'm sorry," was all she said.

Beca swallowed and pulled her legs into her body. "For what," she said. Her voice barely lifting over the sound of her computer's hum.

Chloe finally turned and Beca could see that she was twisting her hands together, twining her fingers and then reversing the motion.

"For coming here like this and…"

Beca's arms wrapped around her knees and she felt even the earth drop out from under her. "Kissing me was that bad, huh?" She loathed herself for saying it. The phrase smacked of self-loathing and the aching of the wound that had already opened from her supposed rejection.

Chloe rushed to place herself in Beca's sight line and waited until their eyes met. "No, the kiss was," she chewed her lip and considered. "The kiss was great, wonderful even, but I'm just confused." A great heave of a sigh released from her small frame. "I don't do this normally." She gestured to Beca. "Get involved emotionally and it's not like you don't know that already. I'm the "no commitments" girl."

She saw the realization dawning on Beca. "That's not what's happening here." Her brow furrowed. "Well, not really. I just… I have feelings for the first time in pretty much ever and it isn't even that simple."

Beca turned her head. "Because they aren't for me." She had no idea who could have captured Chloe's heart but she was really starting to think that she was crazy to think it could have been her. Looking at the girl before her, she was starting to feel like an idiot. She was perfect and Beca was just not.

"That's not it either. I have feelings for you, not that I'm sure exactly what they are, but I also have feelings for someone else."

"Oh," Beca said. She let her hair fall forward, throwing its shadow across her face.

Chloe's heart burned. She had messed up again. "I just don't want to start something here when everything is so confused with me." She tugged on Beca's hands, prying them away from her legs. "But you were the first person I came to when things got awful. You were the only person who could have made me feel better and I didn't even think about how that might be confusing for you. I'm sorry."

Beca didn't respond she just nodded and let Chloe hold her hands. "Just say something. Let me know you at least hear me. I understand if you are mad or don't want to talk about it."

A weak smile cracked on Beca's face and she turned the dim wattage on Chloe. "It's okay." She pulled her hands away and shifted her legs to face the wall. "Really, we're cool. No need to explain anything."

Chloe brought two fingers to her temple, wishing she could fend off this throbbing in her head. She had hurt Beca and almost in the same way that Aubrey had hurt her. It was a crazy chain reaction that she needed to stop. She had to leave so she could think, she needed to be away from the way being here with Beca was making her feel.

She got up and walked towards the door. "I have to go," she whispered as she opened the door. When she glanced back she noticed that Beca had already picked up her laptop again and was looking at the screen, unseeing. "I'll text you later." She was running away, just like Aubrey.

It wasn't until the door closed that Beca let herself feel it. The click of the door was possibility spurning her, a final blow to her opened heart. She sat in silence, knowing that she needed to put on her headphones and find the right song to make herself feel better, but that song hadn't been written yet.


	4. Aubrey (Words Hurt)

"What am I doing?" Aubrey asked herself this over and over, hoping that a better plan would arise from the words. She was back at their dorm, hovering outside the door because she knew that Chloe was in there. It was Sunday night and predictably she would be sitting in front of the TV with her books surrounding her. It was Chloe's weekly study binge.

Before she turned around she reminded herself who she was and that she did not run from things. Well, maybe she had a few days ago but one weekend at home with her father was enough to shame her into returning with renewed determination. Everything had to be perfect and normal again between herself and Chloe. She needed it to be.

The lock turned easy and she entered the apartment, finding Chloe just where she had expected. She could hear the faint music coming from the headphones on Chloe's head and she smiled at the sight of the books haphazardly strewn around the coffee table, floor, and onto the couch. It was something she could see a thousand times and appreciate more on each occasion. It was just so Chloe.

She put her keys down on the table, hoping that the sound would get Chloe's attention but it didn't. So, she moved closer. "Chloe," she said. Her voice carried over the music and Chloe looked up, wide eyed.

"Hey," she said while pulling the headphones off and sitting up. Surprise gave way to bitter flavored words. "I wondered if you were coming back."

Aubrey's lips turned down. She deserved that. "Of course, I came back. This is where I live." She hung her bag on one of the pegs by the door and walked across the living room to the other side of the couch. "We need to talk."

Chloe closed her book and set it aside. She was not thrilled about this turn of events. If she hadn't already been confused enough she could feel the emotion rolling off of Aubrey in waves. It was hard to resist but she didn't want it to sway her to just go along and pretend everything was fine. She wouldn't swallow the hurt this time.

"Okay, talk," Chloe said.

This was going to be harder than Aubrey imagined but she also deserved that. "I didn't mean to hurt you. I know I did. I was stupid." Jumping into the discussion seemed the best approach. Going for the heart of the issue made it less painful to tear the bandage off and the small sentences bolstered her confidence in what she intended to say. "I love you."

Chloe looked up. If Aubrey meant what she was implying then…

"Not just in a friend way." Aubrey's back straightened. "And I'm sorry if I made you think I didn't but it's all useless anyway because I can't be with you." She hated the brutal fact and the words felt broken coming out of her mouth. Chloe's confusion pulled her heart farther into the mire.

"What the hell?" Chloe spat the words. To say the words that she most wanted to hear and then take it all away. It was cruel. "Why would you tell me that?"

The ground was slipping from under her conviction but Aubrey stood strong. "I can't risk it but I wanted you to know that I didn't just kiss you to mess with your head. I lost control for a second and don't worry, it won't happen again."

Giving in to her feelings would just make life harder for both of them because it would change their relationship, it would risk her father's good will, and it wouldn't last. Love never lasted. It was a hard lesson she had learned early.

"Well, I guess I should thank you," Chloe's incredulous voice rose in volume with every syllable. "God, Aubrey, you're so arrogant." She got up and grabbed her jacket. "Seriously… _you_ can't _risk_ it?"

Aubrey was taken aback. "No, I can't. You're my best friend and that isn't something I've ever had before." She followed Chloe to the door. "Plus, you know how my Dad is and I can't lie to him. He will ask if I'm seeing anyone."

The laugh started low and built into an exaggerated guffaw. "Wow," Chloe said. "You know, I've got to go meet someone for coffee. I wouldn't want to _risk_ being late." She walked through the door, leaving Aubrey standing there holding it open.

Aubrey stepped into the doorway and watched Chloe go. Her two feet standing upon the principle she believed so staunchly in. Honesty and emotions were like gunpowder and a flint. The scorch marks were in evidence all over her, leaving her falling apart inside the shell of her body.


	5. Chloe (Action is Reaction)

**A/N: Work has been a bear and the holidays are a particularly busy time in medical land, therefore this took awhile. Sorry, but I hope to make it up to you by getting out the next part before the weekend is out. Thanks for all of the suggestions that I have received on tumblr and from g in the review. I appreciate you taking the time to let me know what you think! Chaubrey has always been my personal favorite but the chance to play with these characters cannot be passed up. **

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Revelations come in many forms. There were those that came from one's own musings, those that came from learning new information, but the most dangerous of them all were epiphanies that came from others. This source had all the power to crush the soul and imbue the mind with the confused state of knowing that nothing was ever as you thought.

Chloe was suffering just such a crisis as the conversation with Aubrey came into sharp focus, only piece by piece. It was not a cohesive, understandable unit of imparted words traded fairly between two people who cared about one another, rather a confession forced upon her ears and then left to ferment in her mind.

Worse yet, was the impossibility of acting upon this new information. She had no idea where Aubrey had gone or what she intended to do now that she had declared a relationship between them impossible. It was wounding that Aubrey had made her declaration and just expected Chloe to abide by her conclusion. It was insulting that she fancied herself the master of their relationship.

Chloe had a say and her side was impossible to tell now. That chance to be a participant in her own decision being taken away from her was infuriating. It was so like Aubrey to march in and announce that all Chloe's hopes could be a reality, that love was reciprocal, and then to dismiss it as a danger to their established relationship.

The more she thought on it, the angrier she became until she had worked herself into such an ill temper that movement was necessary. She needed to go for a run. That was her only outlet for stress at this stage that didn't involve wading into the depths of past casual relationships. A one night stand was not what she wanted anyway.

She huffed as she threw her book aside, right onto the floor. Things were about to get messy around here for the first time. She went to the bedroom and changed into her usual running attire, running tights, worn Merrells, and her Dad's old Dartmouth shirt. Taking action felt good and she hoped that as soon as she was running everything would fall away.

When she hit that second mile there was nothing but breathing in and out, the sound of air rushing past her, and the effort of each muscle as she ran easily along. By the tenth mile she felt her breath come heavy and the free feeling of losing herself left, replaced by the feeling of toil. Then the words crept back in.

_"I love you."_

Hearing that first and probably last time had been the most thrilling and deadening experience of her life. Each step was coming harder now and she was running up a steep incline that lead back into the commons on campus. When she reached the rise she would see all of the gathering places that students frequented. Coffee shops and small fast food places, even a tiny student convenience store that supplied everything from energy drinks for all nighters to cheap headphones for use in the computer labs.

She crested the hill and the lights of campus spread out before her, now a place that she didn't want to be. The comfort of her sanctuary had been broken. She ran without care, moving beyond the pain of running too far and into a second wind populated by a collective numbness of limb and spirit. She wasn't paying much attention even once she ran past the first group of students.

She whizzed by people sitting on benches, lounging along the trail to the small lake, and having dinner under the stars. She finally made her way through the large central courtyard where a huge fountain lay. She looked to the right as she passed the sparkling spray because the sound of the water splashing had always been soothing to her.

While she was trying not to picture the many study dates she had partaken in with Aubrey in this very area, she failed to notice the person walking into her path. That person just happened to be lacking in attention as well. These circumstances converged into an impact and mess of tangled limbs the result of which was two very stunned girls.

Just after she was able to draw breath Chloe started to apologize without even seeing the other victim of the collision. When she cleared the dizziness from her mind she opened her eyes wide and found Beca staring back at her.


End file.
